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Dad 2.0 Summit

A Brief History of the 2016 Dad 2.0 Summit (Now With 10% More Canadians!)

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I spent this past week in Washington, DC taking part in the 5th Dad 2.0 Summit. This being the first Dad 2.0 that I wasn’t speaking at, the first thing I noticed is that my anxiety level had dropped dramatically. Don’t get me wrong, I love speaking at this conference but I get myself so worked up for imminent failure that I can’t let myself relax until I am off the stage, so it was nice to have that calm feeling the whole time. Of note, imminent failure has yet to happen…

The hotel for this year’s event, Mandarin Oriental, was the classiest one to date and this fact became evident to me after my first night there. I drew the short straw on night one and slept on the floor, however the Mandarin provided me with a ton of pillows and comforters to make a bed with. When I entered the room after the cleaners had been by, I noticed that they had remade my makeshift floor bed for me, left me some slippers and folded my previously worn clothes for me. The only thing missing was the towel swan! On top of that, they had what can only be described as the “greatest promo video ever” playing on the television sets in each room. Check the link and I promise you’ll be amazed.

Oddly, one of the highlights of the Dad 2.0 Summit over the years for me has been the unrelated karaoke night that usually happens. Last year in San Francisco was a very light, yet extremely fun, group of people and so I expected this year to be about the same. Imagine my surprise after a couple of us planned the outing to find about 40 people waiting in the lobby, all excited to join us for a night of fun. We laughed, sang and danced, and I’m thankful to everyone who showed up!

There were also a record number of Canadians at the event this year and it was great to see so many of my countrymen and women representing what they do. If you are looking for great Canadian content, here are some links to these fine people! Mike & Andrea Reynolds, Mike Vardy, Justin Connors (also my roommate extraordinaire), Buzz Bishop, Dai “the Moose” Manuel, Andrea Nair, Mike Granek, Matt Clarke, Stewart Reynolds! I’m still buzzing and apologize if I’ve missed anyone. I promise you will be added!

Dad 2 Canadians

Just a few of the Canadians in attendance at Dad 2.0!

Finally, it isn’t lost on me that the reason I get to attend Dad 2.0 every year is because of the sponsors. I am now going to take a minute to show them some deserved love in the hopes that they continue to want to support fathers from around the globe by sponsoring future conferences. I can’t mention everyone but there were a few that really stood out to me so I’ll give you the bullet points on them.

  • Not to play favourites but I look forward to the Lee Jeans booth every year and they certainly didn’t disappoint. More than just being able to walk out of the room in a brand new pair of jeans, Lee creates an amazing experience by offering couches, beer, basketball and an amazing staff who take the time to connect with the attendees. Relaxing in the Lee Lounge has become a Dad 2.0 staple.
  • A new sponsor to the event this year was photo app company, Memory Web. They were so new in fact, that they launched their business just before the summit began. We deal with a lot of PR firms, which is great, but I really thought it was great that the actual owners of the company were there running the booth and their pride in their company shone through in my discussions with them.
  • I couldn’t talk about Dad 2.0 Summit without giving a great deal of credit to the people at Dove Men+Care. These guys have been title sponsor of the event as long as I’ve been attending and they bring it to a new level each and every year! Outside of the amazing barbershop they set up each year, they sponsor meals, speakers and create a mad rush for the tons of product they bring each year. On top of all that, they truly respect and understand the importance of good fathers and that is evident not just at the conference but also in the work they do with the dad community throughout the year.
  • Best Buy took us out on a wicked drone experience in the Virginia countryside and the laughs on the bus ride alone would have been worth the trip.
  • The LEGO night out at the Smithsonian was outstanding and the interactive games they had planned at the event made it a night to remember! You are looking at one third of the LEGO Duplo Bridge Building Competition champions, baby! Getting the whole room to belt out “Oh Canada” was a career highlight for me, too! They also have some great stuff coming down the pipe for dads so keep your eye out for that!
  • KIA added a new wrinkle to their test drives this year by offering professional headshots and the lineup was 6-7 deep at all times, proving that we all want to be made to look pretty!
  • Meta Wellness brought Michael Strahan to the event. Enough said! (They also had an awesome snack bar that I frequented on a “regular” basis. Get it??)
  • In the “memorable moments” category, the folks at Kidde Fire Safety had one of the more interactive displays as they allowed us to compete in a firefighter challenge to see who could get geared up from head to toe the fastest. If you want to see me struggle with this challenge you can head over to the HowToBeADad Facebook video…

There were so many more great sponsors, which you can find on the Dad 2.0 Sponsor Page, but these are the moments that stuck with me.

KIA Headshots

My Professional Shots from KIA

I’ve decided to split my recap into two posts so that I can talk about my personal takeaways, and there were many, separately. For those of you reading this who were or are on the fence about attending the Dad 2.0 Summit, not only is it excellent for meeting the people in the dad community and also for personal growth and development, but the connections you make here are invaluable.

Thank you to Doug French, John Pacini and the rest of the Dad 2.0 team for another excellent event!

The Day the Darkness Crept In

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Edited May 15th: The Dad blogging community recently learned that one of our compatriots, Marc Block from Divided Dad, had succumbed to depression and taken his own life. Now, a number of Dad bloggers have decided to work together to share our stories and hopefully raise awareness about the effects of mental illness and to let others know that it’s okay to ask for help. My story is below and I have linked the other bloggers stories at the end. Thanks.

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It’s hard to pinpoint the exact day it began. The trigger was easy to decipher. It wasn’t long after my father had passed away that I started experiencing the symptoms. Nagging pains, fatigue and a lot of tears quickly became a part of my daily regimen. I was excellent at hiding it, rarely breaking down in front of even my wife, if at all.

When my father passed suddenly after an ATV accident, I felt like my entire world had been stripped from me. Instead of dealing with the grief and pain in the way I imagine most people do, I decided to take on the role of super strong male provider guy, so I wouldn’t have time to stop and think about what had happened. The strategy worked for a while, and then things started to go horribly wrong.

I remember the first trip to the emergency room like it was yesterday. I had shot out of bed with a pain in my chest and shortness of breath and decided not to take any chances. You can imagine my surprise when the doctor’s said everything was fine. The events that followed this visit are something that I will never forget. I must have visited the emergency room about 12 more times that year, along with 10 more trips to my family doctor, 4 specialists and 3 CT scans. Every trip was more discouraging than the next as I was getting no answers and was quickly becoming the poster child for hypochondria.

My lowest point was while we were living at my in-law’s house, with our new baby, while waiting for our new house to be built. I can distinctly remember the feeling of emptiness that was sweeping its way throughout my body. I would try to put on a face for everyone but there came a point where I just didn’t care anymore. There were many sleepless nights, hours wasted just lying on the couch and more trips to the emergency room. I wasn’t exactly an absentee father but I definitely left my wife high and dry, and I certainly wasn’t feeling whatever it was I was supposed to be feeling about fatherhood. I’ve never felt so emasculated and useless in my entire life. These were the hardest days and the ones I regret most when looking back on my son’s first year.

My last trip to the emergency room provided the awakening I had been searching for. I had been thinking a lot about how much better off my family would be without me and my problems in the picture. That’s not to say I ever thought about harming myself, because I didn’t. I just knew how hard I was making things for my family and wondered if things would be better without me, if that makes any sense. The doctor in the ER was sympathetic and asked what I thought was wrong with me. This week, for no valid reason, I believed I had Multiple Sclerosis. He ran some tests and quickly dismissed my fear; and then he saved my life.

He asked if I’d ever been to a psychiatrist, to which I responded, “No way”. You see, I wasn’t crazy and only crazy people needed to see a psychiatrist; or at least that’s what I thought. The doctor insisted by explaining that he thought I had an anxiety disorder and that it could help. To my surprise, it only took a couple visits for me to start understanding why I experiencing all of these symptoms. By the time four months had gone by, I felt like a new man and was well on my way to recovery.

My last session with the psychiatrist was about 3 years ago and I have been almost symptom free ever since. Sure, there are times when I feel the anxiety building, but I am now equipped with the tools to deal with those instances. My point in sharing this story is to let you know that suffering in silence does nothing but make things worse for you and everyone around you. Reaching out for help doesn’t make you less of a person and in fact can only make you stronger, in my opinion. Don’t let the darkness take over, ask for help, you’ll be glad you did.

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Krazy Dad Memoir – Do Not Go Into That Good Night

Dad of Divas – The Time Is Now To Ask For Help

Clark Kent’s Lunchbox- Dump Truck Full of Dead Babies

Dads Who Change Diapers – When the World Goes Numb

Dad’s a Lawyer – Words From the Wife

The Daddy Files – Come Back to Me

Dads Round Table – Strategies to Fight Depression

Be a Little Weird – Recognizing Depression in Men for What It Really Is

Dads Sing Mariah Carey’s “All I Want For Christmas”

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I was recently asked by Tom Riles, who runs the Life of Dad website, if I wanted to be a part of their latest “Dads Sing“ video. I was more than happy to take part and then immediately got nervous when I he told me that we’d be tackling the very challenging, Mariah Carey version of, “All I Want For Christmas”.

As it turns out, it didn’t matter, because the kids and I had a lot of fun with it! And here’s the finished product. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did! PS – The outtakes from my family’s shoot may or may not end up on here at some point as well…

Cheers!

NBC’s Guys With Kids: Swing And A Miss

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I tried to like it, I really did. I stayed up late. I made my wife miss our nightly Young & The Restless tradition. I even taped it so I could watch it again just in case the kids woke up in between.

Unfortunately for me, NBC’s new show, “Guys With Kids”, was completely and utterly disappointing. I have to admit that I had a preconceived notion about what this show was going to be. My worry was that the Dads in show were going to continue the tradition of portraying fathers as bumbling doofuses who can’t do anything right.

THE ASSESSMENT

As it turns out, I was only half accurate in my premature assessment. I really wanted to laugh at this show and had even convinced myself that I could overlook a little bit of the “dumb dad” stigma in exchange for the serious amount of funny I figured Executive Producer Jimmy Fallon was going to bring to the table.

The only problem with that: It wasn’t funny! Not even a little bit.

I waited and waited for the big time jokes but all I got were recycled clichés and mediocre moments of funny, which were immediately ruined by the over the top laugh track. Seriously, I don’t like laugh tracks in general but this one was completely ridiculous, chiming in at awkward moments with uproarious laughter.

The other problem I had is that my earlier worry about the Dad’s being portrayed as imbeciles turned out to be completely true. The show opens with the three Dads hanging out in a bar with their babies strapped to the chests…This is not what Dads do and in fact, I’d be surprised if this has ever happened outside of the taping of this show.

    THE CHARACTERS

Chris (Jesse Bradford) – Chris is the divorced Dad, who seems normal enough until you find out that he is completely whipped by his ex-wife and mother of their child. He states that he loses every argument about the child to his ex because she ends them all with the line, “He Grew Inside Me”, as she rubs her belly. Not only is this unfunny and clichés but it once again paints the Dad in a weak light.

Gary (Anthony Anderson) – I thought for sure the Stay at Home Dad offered the show a chance at some great Dad moments, but they were lost in the fact that all he does is complain about how awful and time consuming it is to have 4 boys. To be fair in this assessment, his wife, played by Tempestt Bledsoe, seems to have the same attitude towards the children.

Nick (Zach Cregger) – I really have no idea what this character is all about and that is part of the problem. All I could gather is that he’s kind of dumb and will most likely be the “crazy do whatever you want with no regard for wives or kids” guy. Third Strike in the “Guys” Department.

The Kids – Almost non-existent. That’s how I would describe the role of the children in this show. This show could have simply been called, Guys, and it would have been able to keep the same premise. If the show continues, I hope there is a little more interaction between the fathers and the children.

The Wives – As mentioned earlier, Tempestt Bledsoe (Vanessa Huxtable) plays a mother of 4 kids and has some funny moments. Jamie-Lynn Sigler plays Nick’s wife and didn’t really play a major factor in the episode but there is room for funny between her and clueless Nick. Finally we have Erinn Hayes, who plays Chris’ ex-wife. I don’t know if it’s the writing, the acting or the fact that she is humiliating Bradford’s character the whole episode, but she is my least favourite character by far.

Finally, I will second the motion put forward by one of my Dad Blogging buddies in The Rock Father, when he described the random appearance of NBA legend Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, saying “his appearance would’ve been far more relevant if it was 1980 and AIRPLANE! had just come out”. I agree sir, and I’ll add that having him fake “Dunking The Baby” was equally as tired.

CLOSING ARGUMENTS

I just read this whole thing back before signing off and while it may seem unreasonably harsh, I really did have high hopes for Guys With Kids and was left completely baffled and disappointed with how unsatisfying it was. I also understand the people who say, “Calm down Dad and learn how to take a joke”, I really do, but that would imply the jokes actually making me laugh, which they did not. When you add that to the fact that the Dads are also portrayed in the same bumbling way we always are, it raises my Dad-O-Meter to a high level of alert.

I really like Jimmy Fallon and think he is a comedic genius, which is the main reason why I was so upset with the finished product. It just missed the mark on too many levels for me, so I think it’s time to go back to the drawing board with this one. On second thought, let’s just sweep it under the mat instead and pretend it never happened… Sorry Jimmy, still friends?

Cheers!

**Photo is from Blogo Wogo**

Dad Blogs Exposed! – 8BitDad

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Now for the triumphant return of Dad Blogs Exposed! I’ve been on vacation the pat couple weeks and was too lazy and relaxed to pre-schedule any posts. The backlash I received was overwhelming (zero messages) so I’m rushing to get thinkgs back to normal!

This week I am going to introduce you to two of my favourite online characters! They are characters in many senses of the word but I’ll try to explain all that in this expose.

8BitDad is co-operated by Zach Rosenberg and Bryan Ferguson and they bill their site as “The Modern Parent’s Source For Real Fatherly Opinions”. It took me awhile to really sit down and take a look at their site but once I stepped into their world, I was completely hooked.

They tackle subjects from Human Rights to Dad issues from across the globe and are strong advocates for parental equality in advertising and media. Just recently, in a post entitled “Bad Dadvertising: Oscar Mayer And McGarryBowen” they took on the folks at Oscar Mayer for their string of commercials in which they made Dad look like a complete buffoon.

Zach and Bryan are about as real as it gets in that they will share their opinion with anyone, at any time, on any subject. That’s not to say they are bullies or jerks, they just don’t hide behind the invisibility cloak that is the internets. Actually, they are very respectful when presenting a counter argument, unless you really piss them off, haha. If these guys don’t like what you’re putting out there, you can bet you’ll be tagged in the next episode of their video show.

Speaking of that show, it’s pretty awesome. There aren’t a lot of other Dad bloggers making videos so they’ve made a bit of a side niche out of creating them. They general recap the week’s posts from their own blog and discuss other issues going on in the Dad Blogging community, which is great to hear about. As mentioned, the other cool thing is that if they mention you, good or bad, they will tag you on Twitter to let you know. At least it gives you the chance to present a rebuttal if you don’t like what’s being said.

I’ve included a video of one of their latest episodes for you to peek at. It’s about 50 minutes long so I don’t expect you to watch the whole thing, plus I’m sure the 8BitDad guys would appreciate a visit to their site if you’re going to watch. Just a quick warning for my readers, that their videos do contain explicit lyrics and should not be watched in the presence of young children.

Also, don’t be frightened by the pink robe, a Dude’s gotta be comfortable, right??

On a personal level, I have been interacting with the 8BD’s more and more frequently and now feel like their Canadian Ambassador. Seriously though, I’ve had nothing but awesome talks with these guys and they are as addicted to Twitter as I am, which is always nice. Other than mocking me for the Country I live in (like they should talk, haha), they have been nothing but respectful to me and for a new guy, I really appreciate that.

In closing, if Dad Blogging had Power Rankings like sports, Zach and Bryan would be climbing the charts quickly while flipping us all a double Shaka Brah!

I hope you’ll check out their site, 8BitDad and also take some time to follow them on Twitter @8BitDads and on Facebook. They also have a Zazzle store with some cool stuff in it, you can check that out Right Here!

That’s all for today’s Dad Blogs Exposed! I hope you enjoyed the feature and I’ll see you next week!

Cheers!

A Commercial Dads Can Be Proud Of

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Please note: I am NOT recommending you go out and buy a Google Nexus 7 here. In fact, I’m not even really sure what that is and most likely will never be able to afford one.

My reason for writing today is because of this great commercial I just watched for the Nexus 7. Ever since I have joined the wonderful world of Dad Blogging, I have had the opportunity to voice my opinion on certain subjects that I would normally have kept to myself. Or bored my wife with.

One of those topics is the poor representation of fatherhood by media, hollywood and corporations. Brands like Huggies and Oscar Mayer know what I’m talking about and they have also heard the backlash from the rising Dad Blogging community.

That’s why I found it refreshing to see an ad featuring a father and son doing something that father’s and son’s do. It didn’t have any gimmicks or crazy “Dumb Dad” moments. It was simply an excellent display of a parent enjoying time with his child and having a camp out in their backyard. Have a look for yourself:

Seriously amazing. I understand that it’s not an exact portrayal of everyone’s experience with their father but it was a mirror of my upbringing and also of the way that I am trying to raise my kids. On top of all that, it has given me a great new activity to try out with my son. We’ve been waiting for my daughter to get a little older before attempting the camping thing but this looks great in the meantime.

That’s really all I wanted to share with you today. I hope other brands will start to take notice and see what at least some of us consider to be powerful and effective marketing to Fathers and Parents alike.

For the record, I’m not crazy “boycott all non-dad friendly ads” guy, I just really detest the brands that make us Dads look like imbeciles to try and sell their product. I love Moms. I have one and there’s another one raising my children. They deserve everything they get and more. It’s just nice to see a company portray Dads in a positive parenting light for a change.

I also want to say Thanks to Bryan and Zach from 8 Bit Dad for bringing this one to my attention. I like to talk Dad here but these guys are “The modern parent’s source for fatherly opinion”! (You guys can pay me via PayPal (US Funds))!

I hope you all have a great day and thank you for your continued support!!

Cheers!