The Trouble With French Boots

I am not a big, boot person. I mean, I like boots for keeping my feet dry in the rain, or for trudging through the long Canadian winters, but that’s about where it ends for me. My son, however, has recently become infatuated with boots. Or, should I say, he has become infatuated with the word boots, in it’s French form.

Boots, In French = Bottes, which, to a 5 year old boy = Butts, which, of course = HILARIOUSNESS!

Unfortunately, the hilariousness does not stop there, because the word Butts is so funny that it can supplant almost any word in the English language. In fact, in some cases, it can replace the lyrics of an entire song. I give you Exhibit A, which is my son’s updated version of the classic, “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star”.

Butts, Butts, Butts, Butts, Butts, Butts, TOOTS!
Butts, Butts, Butts, Butts, Butts, Butts, TOOTS!
Butts and Toots and Butts and Toots,
Toots and Butts and Butts and Toots.

There was more to it, butt you get the point. In closing, if you really want to teach your 5 year old how to speak proper French, you may want to avoid the boots for a while. Also, just as an advanced tip, you may want to avoid the French word for Seal, altogether, as that tends to open up a whole other bag of worms, or sealing seals, as it were.